OUTPUT BUFFERING HAD ME GOING FOR MY JAR OF BUFFERN
A headache indeed I had while trying to install an ecommerce solution. I hacked and hacked in a feeble attempt to get the solution to work. Nope—output buffering, error; output buffering, error; output buffering, error—error, error, error, grrrr! So I contacted GoDaddy Web Hosting Tech Support and unbeknownst to me, Josh the Web Hosting Technology God answered the call.
So I said to Jacob, I have this persistent output buffering error that does not want to go away. It’s like the demon of errors that wants to make my head explode from contemplation. I tried to Google for a solution, visited a score of forums in search of an answer and nada! Can you help me Jacob? And he replies (paraphrasing), OK let’s see what you got and my name is Josh by the way.
So Josh, the God of Web Hosting walked me step-by-step through an installation script which I thought had errors because I know everything and came to find out that perhaps I wasn’t too far from being dumber than a door knob. Josh’s Web Hosting knowledge base made me feel like an itty-bitty geek-baby. Jacob, I mean Josh had all the answers! He was spot on and ahead of me 3 steps in the process. He knew what was going on, why it was going on and more importantly, how to FIX IT!
I am a knowledge sponge, and what satisfied my technology craving was Josh’s inherent nature to not only fix problems, but also his thoughtful insights on why this checkbox needs to be ticked; why I should enter this value versus that one; why the system behaves the way it does and why I should look both ways when crossing the street.
Josh was and is phenomenal. He is the jar of Buffern when you have a headache and is eager to help you with your boo-boo. I was ecstatic, elated, overjoyed and a little bit smarter than a door knob after the call; and guess what else? No more output buffering! I was on cloud-nine and could have sworn I just met Jesus…
I took the time to write this because Jacob, I mean Josh took the time out for me by alleviating my headache, educating me and fixing my problem. Who could ask for more in a world of clicks, ticks, techno booby-traps and ambiguity? Josh deserves more than just kudos, he deserves some coffee and donuts. So I spoke to his supervisor Eric and informed him about Josh’s exemplary knowledge base and ability to resolve issues. I advised him that Josh should be formally recognized for his top-shelf performance and that he (Eric) should get Josh some coffee and donuts.
Jacob, I mean Josh, did you get your coffee and donuts? Great job Josh! Way to to! High-five!